One theme seems to have hit the blogosphere this week…we all seem to be down and/or cranky, myself included. I without a doubt woke up on the wrong side of the bed this morning. When I initially opened my eyes after having dreamt I was pregnant (I think), I was undecided about the mood I was in. Normally I would be ecstatic about the dream hoping this was a sign of sorts but just the night before last I had a dream about my period so clearly I am having mixed signals. Once I finally rolled out of bed I walked into the bathroom only to be greeted by spotting. Yup, just one week into my TWW and I have spotting. I am trying not to over think or freak out as I know this can be common with the suppositories but based on my last cycle REALLY?!?!
Once I was finished getting ready, I got dressed only to feel so bloated I could explode. I just don’t get it; is it the medications that are causing my weight gain or is it me blaming the medications? I am always conscious in what I am eating choosing smaller portions of healthy foods (almonds, apple, greek yogurt) coupled with tons of water. In addition to what I think to be healthy eating habits I work out on a regular basis; with a visit to the gym a minimum of three days a week in addition to the long walk I take during my lunch hour (most days). With all that I am still gaining…what the heck is going on?!?! I won’t be complaining if I have a positive outcome but I am so sick of feeling like Veruca Salt from Willy Wonka for no reason! Monday I am planning to start a month long dairy free diet (I will cut it out for good if I notice the difference) and see if that doesn’t have something to do with what I am hoping is only bloat.
In addition to the above I called my clinic yesterday to talk about my husband getting tested. They thought I was crazy to be calling mid TWW. I tried explaining that this was just a pre-caution. That he wouldn’t be going in until we knew what this cycle brings but we wanted to be prepared. They recognized that my last cycle was just over 10 days before I triggered and also noted that it would take 7 to 10 days to get his results back; so why were they treating me like I was crazy for wanting the referral and to get the appointment set up? Is it so hard to believe that after what could be two failed IUI attempts I want to be sure we don’t need to take a different route?
Ok so I know I am a little ahead of myself. I talk like I already know what is to come. Don’t fret, through all my negativity a little piece of me is still holding tightly onto the morsel of hope that this is the month. I pray I am not jinxing myself completely with my planning; but really what choice do I have? What if it took a few weeks to get him in… I just want to rule out all possibilities of why this isn’t happening as soon as possible in hopes that a solution will arise or a miracle baby will appear.
So there you have it. If you managed your way through the entire blog I give you props as I know what a bummer I am being. I hope you all have an amazing weekend; with sunny skies and some fresh air.