A Discouraging Day

I have a nasty habit of shutting down when things aren’t going well for me. If I am able, I crawl up in my bed and sleep my crappy day away; start fresh tomorrow. Today, I can’t do that. So here I am, sitting at work, staring at the walls of my cube, trying with every ounce of my being to remain productive, and miserably failing.

This morning I had another appointment. Remember, the last one didn’t go so great, not bad but not great. I had one follicle measuring at a 12 with another at 11 and a few 8s, 9s and 10s close behind. I was growing at about 1mm per day.

So today when I went in (again arriving an hour early, note to self; there is no traffic on Tuesday’s, enjoy and sleep in) I was expecting a good 15, 14 or 13.

They called me back shortly after arriving. The “ok” tech, and my favorite nurse walk into the room and we got the show on the road. There was nothing to measure on the right (as has been the case my past 2 visits) and on the left she only measured a few follicles. All of which were under 10mm. My nurse said they would call later today with a new plan, because my current wasn’t working. I would need to have my blood taken then they would take a look and analyze what comes next. I tried asking questions only to receive vague and confusing responses. Mostly I just want to know how things, though slow, appeared to be going well only to regress. Did they just not bother measuring those larger follicles (which makes no sense to me) or are they gone (how do they just shrink?)?! I am so confused!! My poor nurse, though still my favorite, always seems to be the one to give me the bad news.

So here I am anticipating the phone call that could make or break my day (though I’m not sure my day could be effected for the worse at this point).

I took a walk during my lunch. The hope was to clear my head (which failed), and if nothing else burn off some of the calories (finally a notable success…haha).

Just after I wrote this I got my call. They have increased my dose and I will be going back first thing on Friday morning. Time will tell what is going on….

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4 thoughts on “A Discouraging Day

  1. loveh3 says:

    Hoping the increased dose helps. I will be sending prayers for you!

  2. Never experienced that myself but I’m interested to hear what they have to say. Hope by Friday you have the results you were looking for.

    • jdubbelde13 says:

      Today showed progress and then some. They never really addressed the fact that what was once there had disappeared. The only explanation I could muster from them was that the medication was being soaked up by the smaller follicles….so maybe they take from the big to feed themselves (sorry the only way I can think to explain it). I still have no idea and probably never will.

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